Teachers..Shoes..and Some Other Shit...

Kumar and me at Gokul Chat

  Today I have to address something that everyone in Mysore and the yoga cult all over the world seems to ignore.  I will start off by saying that I have so much love and respect for my teachers now and when I  began Ashtanga yoga over 3 years ago.  They will always be my teachers in some form no matter what.  I have a love for them that is unconditional.  If you asked me even a few months ago who my yoga teachers were I would say their names proudly.   This has however changed in my recent trip to India but it's not the only thing that has changed.  Yoga in Mysore and all over the world has changed.  Yoga has become about money and numbers.  Yoga institutes and studios everywhere are turning out yoga teachers like a child spewing vomit after a bad meal at an unfathomable rate and people are getting hurt.

The future of India...So beautiful

  When I was here in 2010 I saw with my own eyes knees crack and pop when practitioners were being adjusted during yoga practice.  I would see people on crutches and ask..."What happened?...did you get hit by a rickshaw?..." They would say..."no... supta padangusthasana...teacher stood on my thigh..but it was my fault..."  I would even dismiss it because my teachers know everything and you don't question lineage.  My last week here in 2010 I tore a hamstring in Utthita hasta padangustasana...I wouldn't say no to an assist because I do what I'm told by my teacher.  I also starved myself to the point of being hospitalized when I arrived home because I was told on a daily basis I was too fat ... and like a hungry kid at McDonalds with a million dollar gift card I ate up everything my teacher said like he was the living Christ...I take responsibility for that fully...  All of this in yoga...All of this in the "main shala"...All of this from an esteemed yoga teacher...  All of this in Mysore, India...The home of Ashtanga yoga...and...All of this is still going on...right now....here in Mysore, India.  In 2013 ...teachers are driving expensive cars and building multi million dollar homes... forgetting where they came from and what their guru worked so hard to build from a couple rupees.  I ask...What would Krishnamachiria do about all this?...Maybe he would do the same thing...I ask is this ok?... They are just human... don't we all want nice things?  Yes...we do but at what cost.  People getting hurt...The teacher should be grateful...I don't see grateful... I see greed, over confidence, and no restraint of the monster rearing it's head... I see students coming into Mysore and getting hurt...bones broken...ligaments torn... and hearts ripped out while the business of yoga replaces the space where the heart of yoga once rested.   Is this progress or is this the beginning of the end?...

Picture by my friend Shi..taking a picture of the kids..

  I feel so stupid when I think about it because I acted the exact same way a lot of these people are acting now.  My teacher would adjust me three or four times in a class and it would be all I would talk about until I went to bed at night.  I didn't even know how it sounded.... I just wanted to throw my blessing at anyone I came into contact with... and I did.  I hear it now from the "main shala" people and I think..."Fuck me to hell...I sounded like that"... It's a kind of worship I'm not cool with now but I did it then.  I think that's why it's so hard to listen to.  It's like looking in the mirror and seeing those white and pink stretch marks across your belly even though the weight is gone and your stomach is flat...It's a reminder of the days when you followed blindly the unawarness that kept you in the dark but all you needed was a little light to show you the way into your own reality and not what everyone else was trying to make you become... so even though I'm ok with the way I am now... the sound of such worship is like splinters of wood under my eyelids...It makes me want to shake the shit out of the old me and the present them... but it will change nothing...It's a journey going both ways to the same place we're just wearing different shoes...I truly believe yoga is the foundation...the feet that carry you on your path...the teacher is the shoe...I like flip flops as do a lot of people..but others like fine and expensive material...and that's ok.  We all have feet and we all try different pairs of shoes on our path...Sometimes we even take the shoes off for a little while to feel the shit squish between our toes...but that path keeps on unwinding day by day and our feet keep walking whether they're covered in nice material or bare to the sole...It's the way it has always been, is now, and will be for eternity.

Baby chicks and mom

  For me on my path I have chosen to step away from my old fancy shoes made of fine material.  I may wear them again but for right now they just rub blisters on my brain...I have found comfort in a nice pair of sandals that get the job done and are easy on my feet.  I also find myself going bare from time to time and it feels nice.  My teachers will always be my teachers and when I come to the end of my path on this road no matter how long I'm hoping to have a box full of worn out shoes. Teachers are the people, places, animals, and experiences on my path...So...I say this...Vande Gurunam Mother India...Vande Gurunam Legs the dog from PFA, Vande Gurunam the beautiful faces in the slums of Gokulam...Vande Gurunam to the animals, homeless, sick and crippled on the street...Vande Gurunam to the unknown present and to the unknown future...May my feet be steady in their path and may there be light in my every step....Gurubyo Namaha...Parama Rishibyo Namaha...Bless all that are and all that will forever be...Amen.

Young lady collecting her daily water

  

Home is Where the Water Runs Shit Brown...

This is a middle class home on a normal street. 

  It's been a rough couple of weeks seeing death and sickness not only in the animals of Mysore but in the people on the streets as well.  Today was my day off from yoga so I sat around this afternoon feeling sorry for myself because my water was coming out shit brown and I really wanted to take a shower.  I looked around and thought to myself..."I'm a baby"..I even referred to myself as "Puss Puss" because I was whining so loud in my head my brain wanted to vomit.  I decided that among the things I couldn't control in my life like shit brown water I'm pretty lucky in the home, family and friends department.  I got off my ass and took a walk while having several of what I call... "Oh Fuck" moments...

Worker class home

  I started my afternoon walk on a different note.  Everywhere I usually take a right I took a left and everywhere I usually take a left I took a right.  India is a different creature in the way of housing.  You will see a very ornately beautiful house and right next door you will see a sketchy shack made of clay bricks and a banana leaf roof.  Of course the big lavishly built houses are beautiful but there's just as much beauty in those clay and straw houses.  I would walk by and the locals would stare like they always do...I would smile huge and then they would light up their faces emulating mine.   The one thing I noticed was no matter how rich you are in India...whether you lived in a shack or a huge ornate house...the laundry is hung out in the sun to dry.  It's beautiful.  You look at the houses and the little shacks and you see a rainbow of colors in the clothes, sheets, and towels hanging along the edge of the homes.  It's quite nice to look at.

Snack cart and houses

  I came up to the slums close to the place I'm staying and saw a bunch of kids smiling and waving at me.  I decided...Why not go visit... so... I went to visit.  I squatted down next to a family while they were eating...The lady of the house who goes by Amma (mother in Kannada)  asked what country I was from and I said.. U.S.A.  She gave me a thumbs up and said Obama... Good... Yes... I smiled at her and said... Yes... Obama... good... She asked if I would like to eat with them.  I saw what they were eating looked very good but it was hardly anything split among a family of five.  The kids looked healthy but thin so I declined politely.  I asked if I could take their photo and they all started getting excited like it was a huge deal.  To me it wasn't... To them it was... It again made me appreciate the access to technology I was blessed to have.  I took some photos and their smiles went from ear to ear.  A few more kids walked up and wanted me to take their photo and show me their homes.

Bath time at the water pump

Siblings

  Mosely is almost seventeen and he works the streets with his dad picking up garbage.  His brother Maurche is in school studying hard so he can pass the college exam.  His family has only enough money to pay for one of them to go into an advanced degree program.  The others have to work and help support the family.  They walked up and asked if I would walk with them to see their houses.  I followed and what I saw was extreme poverty.  In the United States it is about as good as being homeless but they were so proud of their humble little homes.  Mosely wouldn't talk much and just kept pointing to the communal water pump.  I asked... What's that?  Maurche said Mosely is very proud because he helped put in the water pump...Before they had to walk to the other side of the camp (slum) to get water.  Now they can wash dishes, drink, shower, and play all in the same area near their little house.  I looked over and there was a kid washing his hair and playing by the water pump out in the middle of everyone...Then I think to myself... I'm bitching about my bucket shower and my shit brown water... Shame on me... I'm such a typical spoiled white boy.  We walked around and they wanted me to take everyone's photo.  Mosely's uncle drives up on a bike with a friend and they want their picture taken.  Neither one speak any English... I here Maurche talking to them in Kannada... There's some mumbling going on and I ask Maurche what they want.  Maurche says they are asking him to teach them how to say "Welcome to our home" in English. He said it was an honor to have an American come in and see their home.  They see westerners come into the area for yoga but they never stop in to say hello or take their picture so they are very happy I am visiting.  Mosely's uncle finally says..."Welcome Home" it wasn't exactly what he was trying to say but somehow it was fitting. I had to look away because my eyes teared up.  I really felt like I was in the right place at that very moment.

The kids and me

  I walked around and visited a little more and then I started my walk home.  As I was leaving a group of them asked when I could come back and see them.  I smiled and said one day soon.  One of the kids looked up at me and asked if I could bring biscuits (cookies).  I smiled and said I would.  I walked back to my room at the home stay and felt much better about my rancid water situation.  I kept thinking about Maurche and Mosely's uncle who for five minutes tried to learn how to say "welcome to our home" and when he spoke the words that came out were "welcome home".  I felt at home for a few minutes today among strangers in a strange land where the water looks and smells like shit and people living in a shack with little to eat offered me a home cooked dinner...I was home... and it was a great place to be.  I'm humbled and blessed and surrounded by a worldly family that teaches me that people are home where they find acceptance.  I felt that today where I least expected it and for that I am truly grateful.

Uncle and friend

Slums where I felt at home

Little boy playing on the water

Amma..Mother who offered me dinner

Away to Bylukuppe

Gate 

  Today I woke up and decided I needed a break from all of the emotional PFA work and decided to go to the Tibetan refuge in Bylukuppe.  I called Kumar and he came and picked me up and took me to the government bus station where I jumped on a bus to Bylukuppe from platform #8.I got on the bus and went to the back and sat by a window.  A short 2 hours later I was arriving at the Golden Temple in Bylukuppe.  It's a beautiful ride on the bus and only cost 72R.  If you take a taxi from Mysore it will cost you 1900R-2400R depending on who you know.  It's a great savings to take the bus plus you get to experience the on bus sales that go on during your ride.  People get on at a stop with their product and walk the isles and ask you to buy...at the next stop they get off.  This goes on the whole time your on the bus.

Prayer wheels

  Once I arrived I walked the monastery and took in the sights.  There are prayer flags everywhere and it's quiet.  It's so beautiful and a nice change from horns honking and cow shit everywhere.  In the monastery there are no cows allowed so you don't have to worry about stepping in cow pie.  In India it's actually good luck and a blessing if a person steps in cow poop.  I'm trying not to have that many blessings...If you have enough blessings to count around here you probably have pretty smelly feet...I'm hoping to stay shit out of luck the rest of the time I'm in India...I will tell you I have at least one or two blessings already and that's enough.  The colors are so bright and beautiful in the monastery and there are monks everywhere.

Stupa with reilcs

  Bylukuppe is the second largest Tibetan refuge in the world.  There are an enormous amount of Tibetan people of all ages living among the 4 camps.  Each camp is like a little town with restaurants, shops, and housing.  You can spend days there just walking around.  There are little boarding lodges so you can stay a few days if you like.  It's not like India at all.  You think you are in another country all together.

  I walked through the prayer wheels at the end of my trip.  There are over 1000 prayer wheels along a walking trail.  You are supposed to walk the trail and spin the wheels and say your prayer.  When the person comes behind you they spin the wheel and release your prayer into the universe.  There was a little elderly Tibetan woman in front of me.  I kept watching her and she would turn around and smile.

Prayer flags

  After a few hours I headed back to the bus stop and caught the bus back to Mysore.  The air was clean and the trees and grass were so green in Bylukuppe.  It's a different little world up there. India is very beautiful but sometimes you need a little break from the fast pace of even the smallest cities.  This is the place to come and get away.  It's just as magical as the land of Mysore.

Stupas 

That's a freaking ant nest

People For Animals Needs You

People for Animals non-kill shelter

  Today after practice I was really excited to go and volunteer for a bit over at the People For Animals (PFA) in Mysore.  People For Animals is a non kill shelter that takes in hurt, abused, neglected, crippled, and dying animals and gives them the help they need to sustain a healthy life or make their last days as comfortable as possible.  I will tell you now that I was not expecting to see and feel what I experienced.  I will never be the same and I  hope this will make people aware of the abuse not just in this country but all over the world that is allowed to happen to these innocent animals.  That being said for you people who are not animal fans I want you to know that the same treatment is happening to the people of India and all over the world so take off your God damned shades and wake the fuck up.  Get out your checkbooks and off your ass and do something about it even if it's just an after thought.

Sweet little girl who greeted me

  When I walked in the gate I was greeted by a little dog that was very sick but so excited to see a visitor.  She hobbled over to me... just a little bag of bones with no hind leg.  She was so sweet.  I reached in my backpack right away and pulled out the biscuits.  She sat like a good little girl and ate a few biscuits right out of my hand.  They picked her up a few days ago and though she is sick and crippled she is already showing progress.  Her leg had been caught in a fence and they believe she had chewed it off to get free.  They have her on antibiotics and are feeding her curd to put some weight on her.  I ran some energy through her and she sat still for about two minutes and was finished.  The whole time I was there my hands were turned on.  I couldn't even direct the current of energy it was just going to every animal around me.  The dogs and horses and cats and even the birds were soaking it up.  At one point I had to step out of the area so I could rest.  They are so sick and yet so lovable after all the abuse that's been done to them.

She didn't make it..moments after she passed

  I walked over to the garden area they have set up for a memorial and there was a puppy that has been there for a few weeks.  Her mom and siblings are all dead and she is the last one.  Her breath was so labored and I sat by her for awhile.  She lifted her head and laid it on my lap.  I rubbed her head for about 10 minutes until she finally took her last breath.  The vet came over and he said that it was a good passing.  They usually go alone in the night.  I was in tears because it is so unbearable to not be able to do anything.  I can see her now though and she is not sick anymore and she is happy and she will soon join her mom and siblings.  Her spirit followed me the rest of the morning but stayed there when I left and though I know this and I know she is passed to a better place I'm still writing this in tears.

Jimmy the pony

  I got up and walked over to the fence where there was a little pony limping.  I looked down and he had a broken leg.  He was also in an accident and left on the side of the street.  They don't have the resources to do surgery but they have healed the broken skin and flesh and he is getting stronger.  He walks with a limp but he gets around.  I have named him Jimmy after my Grandpa who loved horses.  Jimmy comes right to me and I fed him cookies and chiki (peanut candy).  I'm taking oats for Jimmy on Friday.  My goal in the next 3 months is to help put some weight on him to make him stronger.  Jimmy is followed around by a little foal that's bonded with him.  A little shy but I'm going to work on her.  I have all Summer.

  They have a place inside where they keep the monkeys and wild animals getting ready to be released. There are pigs and tons of cats and kittens.  PFA will go out into the neighborhoods and pick up stray cats and dogs bring them back to the refuge and spay and neuter them.  They clip one of the ears about a third the way down so when they release them back into the wild they can tell the cats and dogs that have been fixed from the ones that haven't.  It's a great method.

Little healthy monkey

  There are a few vets on call but they are limited on supplies.  They need money for food and medicine so they can treat all the animals.  The animals that are the most severe get the treatment first.  Sometimes the others don't make it.  Some days they have enough food to feed all the animals and other days they all go hungry.  It's not like back home where there is a bunch of pet stores and animal lovers to donate food and money.  Most of the people here don't give a shit so it's as if they don't even exist.  There are that handful of locals and westerners that do care and that's why PFA is as successful as it is today.
 
   It's time for these westerner's and yogi's coming into this country to stop being so self centered and come volunteer and donate to places like PFA.  I know people want to do all their self work with yoga and chanting and meditation but how does that make us better if around the corner there are animals and people being abused and mistreated. I love yoga and all that shit but I'm also ok with who I am.  I'm ok with practicing on a moon day.  I'm ok with not chanting with proper pronunciation. I'm ok with having more than one teacher.  I'm ok with not practicing at the "main shala".  I'm ok with not reaching enlightenment in this life or the next 100 lifetimes.  Who the fuck cares about Samadhi when this kind of behavior is allowed to happen to any of God's creatures anywhere.  I have some news for you...No one is reaching Samadhi anytime soon as long as there's this kind of abuse going on anywhere in the world.

She was hit and left for dead. Back end is paralyzed.

  I will tell you that I am very humbled by today.  I am not always the best person I can be or do I act in the highest good all the time but seeing what I've seen today makes me want to try to be.  I will try to give back as much as I can and make as much of a difference as I can in the time I have.  Even if it's just the short amount of time every week spent with little Jimmy the pony with a crippled leg... As long as there are sick, mistreated, abused, and crippled animals in this world we are all broken and sick and crippled... None of us are whole.....And if we are God and God is us then we are neglecting the very part of God we are "one" with.  The animals have no choice...the children have no choice...but we do...so step the fuck up, say a prayer, give a dollar, shed a tear...do something... but don't do nothing.





***I would like to thank Chris Ebbe, Warren Baker, Tracy and Raymond Cox for all they do and have done for the people and animals of India.  These people have not only raised money for organizations here in Mysore but they are making a difference in educating and unconditionally loving the people of the world.  I love you guys and you are my heros.***

Did You Say Practice On a Moon Day?

Wind chimes at Mystic School

  I've been practicing Ashtanga yoga for about 3 years now.  Ashtanga yoga is the yoga for me where I can find peace of mind and a balanced body.  I began practicing Ashtanga yoga under Johnna Smith who I studied with in the West and then later Sharath and Saraswathi Jois in Mysore India and now Jaiprakash here in Mysore. It was then and still is such a rewarding process and I am so very grateful for my teachers old and new.

    The first three years of practice I was always told not to practice on a moon day. That's when there is a full moon or a new moon you take a day of rest.  I didn't ask questions I just listened to my teachers and stood down from practice on the moon days.

    In my intuitive studies I found later that the body is on a cycle with energy and the moon.  In the intuitive world as in the yoga world we focus on energy.  On the full moon your intuitive energy which is your feminine energy(whether your a guy or lady it doesn't matter) cycles from your pituitary gland all the way down to your root chakra and your feet chakras where it is grounded in 1st chakra and earth energy. This is not bad but it is primal energy and humans tend to be more primal acting.  You always see people acting crazy on the full moon this is because our intuitive energy is based in the lowest chakra and we can fall prey to animalistic behavior.  I will go on to say that in the Ashtanga world under some lineages it is thought that the intuition and energy surrounding it is more out of control when it is being directed from the base chakra so a day of rest is recommended.  

Jack fruit

  On the day of the new moon your intuitive energy is back home in the pituitary area of the brain and people are more balanced and settled in their thoughts and intuition.  It isn't a better place for your energy to be centered it's just the beginning of where the intuitive energy starts it's cycle.  The energy of the base chakra on the full moon is responsible for the momentum in the cycle of energy so one is just as important as the other...  Again in some lineages of Ashtanga yoga it is recommended to have a day of rest.  This is because the body is so relaxed and the mind is in the perfect state for meditation so the psyche is energetically set up physically and emotionally for a day of rest.

  For the last 3 years I have followed the Jois Yoga lineage and not practiced on a moon day.  I would even do the human thing called judging and call people out who would practice on a moon day. I say now...I'm sorry for being a human and doing what we all do best and thinking that the way we are personally taught is the best way...I was mistaken.  I have practiced under my new teacher Jaiprakash at the Mystic School and Meditation Center for 3 full weeks now and I have practiced on two moon days.  I feel the same.  No hole opened up and swallowed me into the depths of hell.  Shiva didn't come down from the heavens and strike me dead with his bad ass flaming sword...My practice felt the same.  I loved it and I hated it at the same time like I always do.  I was tight where I am usually tight and I was flexible and fluid where I am always flexible and fluid...so...what does that mean?  God probably likes me better than you.

The perfect coconut

  I think Mysore is an extraordinarily awesome yoga buffet.  I also believe that Yoga is the guru.  With out my teachers I will tell you I would probably have my big toe in my ass and not know an upward facing dog from a rickshaw so I am very grateful for all of my teachers.  I used to believe that one was better then the other and now I know that they are all different and wonderful in their own right.  That being said I have teachers who say..."no practice on moon day...holiday...day of rest"...I also have teachers that love the practice so much they practice sometimes twice on a moon day because it feels so good...I have teachers that say a moon day is a day to be aware of practice like every other day...Practice and be aware but do not skip practice because of the moon cycle...modify practice to the way your body feels... So at this time in my life I practice on moon days and I'm ok with the out come.  The older my practice gets the more I realize that the only yoga for me is the yoga that serves my body and the greater good and for me that's the best of many teachers and many experiences.

Masala dosa and chai breakfast

  I will tell you I was a little gun shy walking around Gokulam this morning on a moon day with a yoga mat...but you know what...I said to myself...Fuck that...I'm getting a coconut...and you know what...I got a coconut...and walked the long way home with my yoga mat in hand proud to be a practicing yogi on a moon day.  Life is good and that coconut was the best damn coconut I've ever had.

Spoiled little lady on daily walk

Fuck Luck How About Hard Work

Buddies

  I will tell you that I am a very fortunate and blessed individual.  I was raised in a family with great siblings and parents that worked hard to give us what we needed.  Of course there is the usual family dysfunction but that's in every family.  My friends, family, spouse, dog, and Universe have been very good to me and I have been blessed with a good life.  Please hear me when I say I am truly appreciative and grateful.

  This morning I received and email from a gentleman who used to take a few of my classes and has been following me on Facebook and my blog while I'm in India.  This individual wanted to tell me that he hoped I knew how "lucky" I was to be on the journey I was on.  He went on to tell me that not everyone could do what I'm doing and he didn't want me to take my experience for granted.  He wanted me to take time out of my day and thank the good Lord for the "lucky" life I had received....  I am a student first and always but I cannot ignore the fact that a small part me is a teacher as well....  Here's a little lesson on luck.

Luck by definition: Success apparently brought on by chance rather than one's own actions.

Mr. and Mrs. and baby goat

  My success in my trip to India and my career as a yogi, intuitive, and energy worker has nothing to do with luck.  I have spent several months over the last 3 years away from my family, spouse, dog, and friends working my ass off to get to where I am right now.  I loved every minute of it so do not think I am complaining.  I wouldn't change a thing.  I'm just saying that this wonderful life I am living has nothing to do with the "lucky" life the good Lord gave me.  I am also a firm believer that if little ole me from Morganton, NC can work hard and live the kind of life I'm living so can anyone else.  God gives each and every one of us the gift of Free Will.  It's the right to make decisions good and bad that get us to the places in our life where we can benefit from a higher god like vibration.  It's by being selfless and helping others and constant work.  There is no such thing as coincidence or "by chance"... That being said...  I'm here living a great experience that I am so very grateful for and would not change for anything.  I am also away from my friends, family, spouse, dog and home for 4 months in a developing country where you see hunger, sickness, greed, poverty, and the most beautiful people you can ever imagine continuing to work hard and love what I am doing.  It is not easy but again I am so grateful....Not "lucky".  I wouldn't change a thing but I will give myself, friends, family, and spouse the credit we all deserve in the hard work we have all accomplished for me to experience my life and this experience...  Not chance...not luck...not coincidence...just hard work and unconditional love.

  I will end with one thing.  To the guy who was addressing my "ego" and my soul in order to make sure I am being appreciative of what the good lord has given me I have this to say...(stepping out of the higher self)....Take your luck... drop the L... add an F... and you can have it back.


Namaste.

P.S. If you don't like my pictures...Don't tell me...I don't care...India's not Julia Roberts and silver beaded malas...Get over yourself...

Guru's coconut stand

Idly vada